Date: 5/29/2008

What you dread hearing her say

My friend is pregnant/engaged...
If she tells you her friend is pregnant or engaged, run... This seems harmless enough ,until you catch that thinly veiled hint of disappointment in her voice. At this point, what she really means is, "when will we be engaged/pregnant?" be prepared with an expert diversion at this point.
Nightmare is when she comes with the even more chilling, "i am pregnant" statement. Unfortunately nothing will help you on that one.
My parents want to meet you...
This means two things:
1.the relationship has crossed an importannt milestone of seriousness.
2. You are about to be psychologically cavity-searched under the family microscope
All you can do is hope her father doesn't mention that if has some rusty wire cutters if wants to use.
Is she pretty?[b]
She already caught you looking at the mind-blowing sexy woman that passed by, on matter how covert your glance. So if you say 'no,' she'll know you are lying and an arguement will ensue. This is the time for very artful tact, such as,"kind of, but she has a monumental behind and that's not nice." now pray.
[b]What are you thinking?
Women are curious. They need to know your every thought, hunch, and inkling. Men, on the other hand, don't like to discuss nd explore everything: we are content to keep quiet.
[b]I have a headache... That means no action for you tonight. But if you can beat her to it. If you sense she is particularly tired when you are horny,give give her an unsolicited painkiller. If she says,"but i don't have a headache," give her a grin and do your thing.
[b]Be a man...
Nothing is quite as injurious as having your manhood questioned. You could give in to her shame tactics and do what she wants,or deflect it back by saying,"how about you be a woman and quit nagging?"
It is a rite of passage. While no man likes to hear aforementioned phrases,every man will,at some point endure them. The best you can do is to be prepared.


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